Friday, December 14, 2007

WTF Mate?

I accidentally own a pair of Seven jeans. I hadn't realized they were Seven jeans when I bought them and may have reconsidered the purchase due to my antipathy toward flashy designer labels but nevertheless I own a pair of Seven jeans.

I am lazy. I pay people to do my laundry, they wash it, dry it, and fold it for 60 cents a pound. It's almost as cheap as if I were to do it myself, but still I have to actually bring the laundry to the laundromat (which is 32 steps from the front door of my apartment). I did this yesterday for the first time in several weeks.

I am not wearing any underwear. Not in like a sexy Sharon Stone kind of way but in a "I don't have access to any boxers because all of them are at the laundromat" kind of way. And the point of this whole, seemingly pointless, string of words is that Seven jeans are uncommonly comfortable commando pants. I'm free and I'm lovin' every minute of it! Kudos to Seven, you may sell exorbitantly priced jeans and probably exploit child labor to do so but man do you guys make a nice pair of pants to wear when your not wearing any underwear.

Also:

There is a BMW showroom on Wall St. that I walk by everyday on my way to work. There is a sign on the store that says something to the effect of "No dogs allowed except dogs for the visually impaired," this intrigues me greatly. Are there allot of blind people looking to purchase BMW's in Manhattan? Are any of the people reading this sign visually impaired? Do people often take their dog for a walk and decide to buy a BMW? These questions plague my daily commute.

In summation:

I'm going to be a contributing writer for Dance Retailer Magazine. I am uncertain what that will entail but I imagine it will include exposing the dirt of the dance retail industry. Frankly for too long the dance retail industrial complex has corrupted the minds of our youth and I'm just the man to put them in their place. The first and last sentence of this paragraph are true, have a good weekend.

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